(Originally posted July 17th, 2013)
For the lead-up to Cedar’s fantabulous eighth birthday I posted these conversations on the book of faces, because what is 8 but a mirror of 3? Here they are again:
no. one: The snake and the rock
me: Do you see that snake down there on the ground?
cedar: Yes. It is beautiful. We should not throw something at it.
me: That is true. We shouldn’t.
cedar: Because someone might find out.
me: Well. Maybe it just is not such a good idea. We could hurt it.
cedar: Yes. And somebody might get mad.
me: Really, Cedar, we just should not want to hurt the snake.
cedar: Yes. And someone might find out we did it because a rock would crush the snake.
me: Cedar?
cedar: What?
me: I think you need serious help.
cedar: No. I can throw the rock by myself.
no. two: Building Materials
cedar: I am going to make a house but I don’t know what to use to hold it together.
me: You could use nails.
cedar: No. Nails could hurt me if they got into me.
me: How about mud?
cedar: No. Papa will say I am not allowed to use the hose.
me: Some people use cinder blocks.
cedar: They are too heavy for me. Oh. I know! I could use blood.
me: Blood?
cedar: Yes. blood is sticky and it dries.
me: You see no other problem with using blood?
cedar: (thinking) No. Blood will be perfect.
no. three: Dinner
cedar: What are we having for dinner?
me: I don’t know. What would you like?
cedar: I want something that will not come off my fork.
me: So, spaghetti is out?
cedar: We should have them with rice.
me: Have what with rice?
cedar: The eyeballs. They will not come off my fork.
me: And where are we going to get these eyeballs?
cedar: Not monkeys. Monkeys are cute. (thinking) I know–from people.
me: What people?
cedar: Nobody we know. Strangers.
no. four: Spider in a Bathtub
cedar: There is a spider in the bathtub.
me: Oh yeah?
cedar: It is very beautiful.
me: That’s good.
(1 hour later)
cedar: The spider is still in the bathtub.
me: Yep.
(1 hour later)
cedar: The pretty spider is still in the bathtub.
me: All right. Thanks for letting me know.
(1 hour later)
cedar: The spider is still there.
me: Okay.
(1 hour later)
cedar: I will let the spider die now.
… (sound of faucet turning on)